Serrures et Cadenas

I arrived at my house at 1am last night completely worn out after a long day trying to get computers to work. I drug myself up to my door and put the key in the lock. It turned about halfway and then stuck completely, much to my distress. I tried turning it back and it wouldn’t. I tried jiggling it to no avail.

I couldn’t just crank on it because the lock, like most everything here, was made in China. Nothing against the Chinese, but their choice of fabrication materials is sometimes strange. For instance my keys would at first glance appear to be made of steel, like keys back in the States. Given the strength of the metal though, it is much more likely that it is made out of very thick aluminum foil. This means that even my most meager of attempts were bending the key and threatening to break it off.

Eventually I just gave it a yank that pulled it out of the lock. I then found I couldn’t get it back in. Again, recall that the setting is me standing exhausted in front of my house at 1am after a good 12 hours at the university.

I take a look around and argue the wisdom of sleeping on the sidewalk. A minute passes and I trudge out to buy a sandwich walk on over to Marc’s. I get to his place about 2am and crash exhausted on his couch, not to awaken until my French teacher calls me at 9am the next morning to ask me why I’m not at home.

“Ugh,” I think to myself and wander back home.

I don’t know what the hell I did to that lock, but the quote that came to mind was from Something About Mary, “How in the world did you get the beans above the frank?” There are a set of pins that are pushed up by the key. There are breaks in each one at different places and the different heights on the key make the breaks line up so the tumbler can turn. Somehow my exploits of the night before had gotten is so that pins lined up with the flat side of the key rather than the bumpy side.

A locksmith came in to try and open the door, but not surprisingly he was not successful. Eventually he just went at it with a hammer and screw driver. He managed to destroy the inside of the tumbler and remove the pins, but it still wouldn’t turn. So, he just took a crowbar and pried at the door until the bolt snapped. I suppose that cheap materials sometimes have their advantages.

I’d not really noticed, but the now destroyed lock is not attached to my door with screws. Instead it is welded straight to the metal of the door; making it irreplaceable without calling in a welder. Great.

My house is now secured with a big padlock. It ought to be fine though.