RE: J: Thinking too much again (rant)

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be aware of, and responsible with, the power and influence you have. But you should definitely balance your perception of your own power with the power of others and not ascribe too much one way or another. You’re not, as Dr. Evil says, all that and a bag of potato chips.

Mm, I think we don’t give ourselves credit for how powerful we are. I believe that weakness is more a state of mind than anything else. This comes from my personal experience: In my life, when I’ve felt powerful, I was generally more capable (do I need to define power?) and able to accomplish my goals then when I felt weak, regardless of how I actually was, or how other people viewed me.

My thoughts hearing this whole discussion both on and off list has centered around this topic. I have heard tales of dramatic conversations destroying a person’s concept of reality and sending them into a pit of confusion, but I have never actually seen it happen. I look at the people I know and the only ones that I think I could have a serious effect on psychologically are those who are already tipping towards the edge anyhow. And of those I have known maybe two in my life.

I can see where the influence of my personality has changed people that have had extended contact with me, but in general I think psychological change is more likely and more permanent given a consistent influence by a constant stimulus over the period of months.

I know that I have psychological safety measures in my head and if things go too far too fast I compensate. Most everyone is like this I think. I guess there have been times that I have been really struggling with issues and really deep in them and if someone really abused me and said just the right things they would have been able to get some dramatic effect, but nothing permanent.

And the sort of person it would take to know just the right thing to say and just the right time to say it is rare. Even then it is a highly individual situation and all of the energy is coming from me. I guess the person with the psychological perspicacity to figure out a person’s issues and then the drive to damage someone could exist but I don’t think anyone around here needs to worry that they are that person. =)

I’m not saying you can’t effect another person’s psychology at all. I have had 5 minutes of dialogue with Kurt and it most definitely left a mark on me, but it was far from a fucking. =)

Ok, power to me is competency and capability to attain what one desires in life at any given moment.

I think power is the ability to cause change; your disposition is trivial I think.

There are always unintended consequences. Part of the mindful person’s job is to be aware that it can happen and work to minimize damage.

Agreed. Is there any reason you chose the word “job” over “responsibility”?

I think I like job better too. My perspective on this whole mentor thing is that in the end it comes down to living well every day. It is in some ways like a job that you decide to do. Responsibility is a philosophical sort of word and almost too removed from the day to day action of being mindful.

I believe Clark asked John several questions, John thought Clark was implying that there was something wrong with John, and kinda freaked out over it…but John and Clark are both on this list, if they don’t mind, I would like to hear both of their current views?

I agree that this sounds like it is taking too much away from John. Surely his self-concept was not fragile enough that Clark asked him some questions and the idea that Clark didn’t like him destroyed it. I just met the fellow actually and he seemed to me to be both in good health and spirits as well as a normally emotionally resilient person. There definitely wasn’t a sense of fraility or impending collapse. =)

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